Monday, April 4, 2011

S4x07: I'm NOT the GUY


Yes, it was unplanned at first. Yes, it was against my desire at the beginning. 
But things changed......

They told me, there's more to it than just a pose. They said it is called knowledge, challenge, experience, education all those words which I love the most. 
But, Yes. True. They are right.


It really has been a while since the last post. I was undergoing a very difficult transition in my life which I never really expected at the first place. I took part in the campus election. Pressure was from everyone including those who you think are a friend of yours and would be able to understand you way better. But nope, one just sink into the venomous sting of gossiping an yet exert an extra "Pal Support". In fact, I've never really seen myself as The President until I'm actually one now. Sometimes I wish I could just stop sharing things with my friends because I know it annoys them to listen to this. Damn, this is difficult. Another thing is that, I realised how people just don't care about my feelings, as long as they get what they want and that's it. They treat you as if you're a dog and WOW. You know, you might be screwing with the wrong guy because I'm not the guy who will just keep the pain in my ass tightly in my pants. Dictatorship~partly beneficial in this case. Oh MY! There goes my bitchy whines. See the YELLOW POSTER thingy? Yea, I know it's me in it. This is what they posted on FB. This is my worst fear ever. Life really changed now, I no longer have the same mood to revise for my finals and yeah, distracted by the words of snobbish human being. I can see that my personal progress's graph is going down in flames. I'm about to meet Mr. Failure.

I THINK I'M DONE WITH THE
ELECTION THINGY     


-No More Election/Presidential Talk, I promise-


SCAPEGOAT

I'm really to let go. The thing that I loved the most. The thing which I really hope could make a difference in my four years life in this "wonderful home". I'm annoyed, I'm tired and I just couldn't take it anymore. I need 'em to be independent, I need 'em to stop relying too much when they have proven their capabilities with them commenting on my decisions and my alternatives to help improve the team. The best part, putting the blame on me when they are not willing to give all out and learn. People, me myself face the same thing when I first arrange events, etc. You need to survive the red tapes. I realise that I can no longer be there for 'em. I don't think they see what I'm going through in my life because what's more important is theirs. So, I'm letting it go this time. I don't mind being part of the crowd because I wanna see you handle things, since you know so much about it. I will always be there to support. And of course, it's not the entire crowd giving me THIS. Most of them are beautiful and supportive. I love them very much and stepping down is partly to maintain the love I have for 'em because I don't want things to change.

Yes, I know the joy of putting everything on me. It's very easy.

I'm NOT the GUY
-most people will not get this, but some will-
  


3 comments:

  1. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  2. ferd.. aku sbenarnya terkejut tengok poster kau kat fb tu.. satu soalan nak ditanya pda msa tu tp nmpak mcm sibuk sgt.. adakah anda terlibat dalam poster tu? atau orang lain yang create semata2 nak naikkan ideologi itu? sory tapi pada pndangan aku, kamu mcm dipergunakan..

    apa2 pun gud lark.. jgn ikut sngt telunjuk orang.. ikut kata hati dan ikut acuan sendiri. xperlu ikut acuan orang lain andai kamu x suka.. acuan dan kuasa dah ada ditangan kamu.. buat yang terbaik.. persetankan pandangan orang. gud lark

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  3. Cakap pasal dipergunakan ni, aku rasa macam semua pihak pun cuba nak pergunakan aku. I'm still learning, Just got back from meeting MPP seluruh Malaysia, da lei bukak mata sikit la.

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